I'm So Broken...Lord, Where's My Hello-Kitty Band-Aids???

Recently, I have found myself broken before the Lord...ALOT! I'm in this season that know one really likes to be. It's the kind of season where the Lord is trying to teach me so much that me head just starts turning and spinning with confusion. It's the kind of season that I will be thankful for in a year, but just want to be out of right now. I feel as if I am being led in so many directions. hearing so many voices, and not being able to pick out HIS. I want Him, I NEED Him, and I want His will to be done. I want His desires to be fulfilled, and I want to be able to accept anything He places in my path. That's easy to say...anything is easy to say, but It's so hard to actually do.
I'm studying the book of Ruth right now with my friend Danielle. If you know Ruth's story, then you know that she entered a land completely foreign, even when she was given multiple chances to turn back. She knew God wanted her to go with Naomi to Bethlehem. It's hard for me to know what I would have done if I would have been in Ruth's shoes. If God said, "Hey Caroline, I want you to go live in Algeria, (the first country I saw when I googled a map of Africa) where you don't know anyone, the language, or the ways of the society. I just want you to go and serve me. I will provide everything that you need. Just trust me and go." Would I go? I mean if God has just said go to China, there would have been no question...but Algeria. More than likely I would have said no. I would have rejected a chance for God to use me, a chance for me to be His hands and feet. Is that convicting or what???
It makes me wonder how many times I've said no to God for the little things. "Hey Caroline go sit with him. Hey Caroline, you love me right, then go to this." I know I've done. I want to be in a place where I can just say, "YES LORD." I want that so bad. I crave that. I want my Hello-Kitty Band-Aid, a chocolate-chip cookie, Survivor re-runs and for my life to just be perfect. Well...I'm far, far, ohhh so far from perfect.
I'm confused and upset with myself when I have struggles, or doubts. I know and trust though that struggles with God aren't a lack of faith, but they ARE faith. Anytime you struggle in a relationship, you always grow stronger, and wiser. I'm working on my relationship, and He's always holding a box of Hello-Kitty Band-Aids, even if I can't always see them. He's chiseling away my pride and selfishness, mending my beautiful, broken mess, and molding me into the Caroline He's long planned for me to be!